By Chris Klonoski
It is officially Summer.
A Sonoran desert summer is not the summer of my childhood. I don’t ride bikes, eat popsicles, lay on blankets in the yard, and read books on my twin bed under the hum of the rotary fan. I don’t do these things because I am A. a grown up and B. it is 108 degrees outside.
I would do all those things – despite being a grown up – except for the relentless heat. Because Summer is supposed to be the time of being lazy, only doing things you want to do, daydreaming, sky gazing and seeking pleasure for pleasure’s sake.
As responsible beings with careers and responsibilities and leadership roles can we still seek some sort of casual peace, laidback satisfaction, and spontaneous fun? Or does the act of seeking it actually turn it into another item for the to-do list?
The entry point to seeking as a pleasurable activity, something that brings us closer to ourselves, lies in the longing.
What do you long for?
Empty days, no agendas?
More leisure time together with friends?
These days I long for rain, and a walk in a forest without a designated path. I want to be somewhere wild – not in survival mode, or something to prove mode – but in welcoming mode, observing mode, listening mode. I want to hear something true and not have to define it or record it or explain it to anyone else.
Longing tells us what’s in our hearts.
It may reveal a long-buried memory. It’s a scent, or the way the shadow plays on the gray wall. It’s a few bars from an old song. Or a photograph, not from your life – but one that reveals something you hope will be a part of your life…one day. Longing can cool things down or heat them up. Longing is being grounded in your daydream, a hope that is tethered to something – or someone – real.
It is the longing (the intent) holding hands with seeking (the action) that makes the pursuit meaningful. I seek because it’s necessary to our humanness to not forget about play, curiosity and exploration. We need it.
In the words of the artist Van Gogh, “ I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart.”
I am committed to take at least a few of these longer days to pursue something fun or interesting, just for the fun of it. I wish to seek something that brings me joy or wonder. I am open to stumbling over something awesome.